Dude's Must See Products for October 2023

I see this Cat Face Massager and have one thing to say to my own cat / arch nemesis about it: get ready for an enemies to lovers story, Zanzibar!

The cheap plastic wand with textured roller ends looks a lot like the human face massagers they try to convince women will remove eye puffiness and sculpt their jawline and give them the energy of all 5 of their children combined. But maybe the ladies have grown wise to this snake oil, and so now someone is stuck with a shipping container of face rollers, and is pivoting to the next most profitable demographic to get rid of them: cat owners.

Life (i.e., your carpentry or sewing project) throw you a curveball? Roll with it. Crichton Coins are simple measuring tools that roll around curves and complex design details to provide the accurate measurements that standard rulers and tapes - even the fancy laser ones - cannot.

This pair of Crichton Coins, one with imperial and the other metric measurements, comes from Silver Fox Tools. They are made of solid brass with engraved markings that won't wear off over time. A bullet start mark designates where to place the coin to begin rolling and tallying your inches or centimeters. The imperial Crichton Coin covers 6" per rotation, and the metric 15cm.

Anyone you know love maps and conflict with equal gusto? Well look no further than Battles Map by Map as the perfect gift for your favorite warmongering cartophile! (Military and history buffs will probably dig it too.)

Battles Map by Map is part of DK Publishing's "luxurious" Map by Map series. This entry uses geography and lots of cool visuals to give readers insight into the world's most famous ancient, medieval, and modern melees. Its maps show what the likes of Rameses II, Napoleon, and Alexander the Great studied to plan their attacks, and DK's addition of annotations and charts depict how they played out. Timelines and text boxes further explain the battles' chronologies, events, and contextual information on weapons and technology used, and leaders and armies involved.

The Crocs Classic Cowboy Boot. Sigh. Dudes. Ladies. Throughout these pages, over these years, I feel I have already shared every insult, every disparaging remark, every ounce of hatred I have for Crocs "footwear." And just when I thought it couldn't get any worse than KFC Crocs...and then any worse than 7-Eleven Crocs, Crocs has gone and stolen their own title in the Ugly AF Shoe Championship once again.

Crocs Classic Cowboy Boots are a pair of plastic-ass Crocs extended up high, textured down low, and gussied up all over to look like a pair of tacky-ass cowboy boots ready to hit the town in Branson, MO.

Happy Halloween, dudes and ladies! My gift to you: Dark Inspiration: Grotesque Illustrations, Art & Design. A coffee table book to scare both the unwelcome trick-or-treaters and your mother-in-law away!

Dark Inspiration was previously released as a two-part series from design book publisher Victionary. In honor of their 20th Anniversary, the house has condensed all of the grotesque illustrations, art, and design that fed their dark inspiration into a single volume, and is reissuing it as a combination of macabre art highlights from the originals, plus some new works they hope will also ensnare and unsettle, and fascinate you with their darkness too.

Or maybe just frikkin' freak the frack out of you.

Toilet Sword, you have my attention. For your sword-y design, of course. For your self-description as "revolutionary." And most of all, for your claim that you are better than a plunger, because, as my post-Loaded Chili Totchos clogged toilet would indicate, better than a plunger is exactly what I need.

I'm not sure I'd pay over $250 for a jacket, and I definitely wouldn't pay over $250 for a shirt, but a Relwen Moleskin Twill Insulated Shirtjacket? A twofer?! ... I'll mull it over.

Relwen's Moleskin Shirtjacket is made of a hefty sueded cotton twill and quilted with 80-gram recycled insulation for wear in temperature ranges of 30 to 45 degrees F. In other words, the enhanced button-up is perfect for our newly arrived fall weather, and will protect you for as long as it can when the pleasant crispness begins devolving into bitter winter chills.