The Best Projectile Launchers

The most literal projectile launcher you can buy. Perhaps also the most accurate albeit - blech! - with an educational bent. Vernier says kiddos and teens can "Use the Vernier Projectile Launcher to investigate important concepts in two-dimensional kinematics" by launching steel balls at precise angles.

I say grown ass men like me and my friend Cornelius can use the Vernier Projectile Launcher to investigate how many LEGO minifigs we can knock over if we set them up domino-style. The whole LEGO Ferris Bueller cast maybe?

This launcher adjusts between 0 and 70 degrees, and can send its projectiles over distances of over 8'.

This desktop warfare weapon comes from the genius mind of Leonardo da Vinci. Now, da Vinci didn't invent the catapult but, as with anything that crazy Medieval MF touched, he did figure out how to make it way better. And I think if high-rise office buildings, contemporary desktops, and floors with dozens of co-workers existed in 1485, da Vinci would have been the Father and Grand Master of cubicle warfare just like he was of painting, architecture, mechanical systems, paleontology, ichnology, and Dan Brown novels.

With this Catapult Kit, you can get a hands-on peek into the Italian stallion's greatness. It includes all 2 dozen+ pre-cut parts needed for assembly, and even the glue because da Vinci wouldn't have been shiesty about selling key components separately like that.

Big & Rich recommend ladies save a horse, ride a cowboy, and the Can Cannon recommends cowboys save a bullet, fire a shook-up sodie can.

The Can Cannon attaches to your AR-15 / M16 rifle to provide hours of useless fun launching soda cans, or any other heavy, thin-walled object you've got in your lair. (A Can Cannon Instagram follower said he's used his to fire tennis balls too.)

It contains a proprietary gas ported barrel and pressure tube, both to give projectiles an average range of 105 yards, and to reduce exposure to high pressure gases, which could "detonate" carbonated beverages too soon. Maker X Products says the Can Cannon is 100% legal, and provides a link to their BATF approval letter on its listing page. The design is not considered a Destructive Device or firearm. (Note: The thing you attach your Can Cannon to still is.)

Faster than a speeding bullet! Well...not really. But faster than a speeding steel slug firing out of any other slingshot. The Pocket Shot is a next gen slingshot. At least in terms of its rate of fire and multi-projectile versatility. Design-wise it looks like one of the circa 1978 hot water bottles my grandma used to give me alongside my stuffed rabbit when I had the flu chills. However the Pocket Shot's technical achievements, such as its ability to fire anything from .4 cal paintballs to arrows at up to 350 feet per second, wouldn't exist without its antiquated aesthetic. The weapon's circular shape and soft stretchy pouch are what enables shooters to interchange ammo and fire at 2 to 3 times the rate of a standard slingshot.

Peleg Design calls their PenPOW pencil-mounted slingshot "your secret weapon against boredom." And since we all know boredom runs rampant in classrooms and cubicles, we should probably take this opportunity to protect our children and invest in some gifts for the office that will combat the assault.

Sold in 2-packs, the PenPOW is a 2.2" long clip that grips onto any standard pencil. Point its arm downward when it's time to learn long division / write out your taco order so Bob doesn't F it up again during his turn to do the lunch run, and then, when the attack is imminent, turn the graphite-hugging slingshot 180 degrees, think about sucking on a lemon, and get those spitball projectiles ready!