HAPIfork - The Smart Fork
WARNING: Eating too fast leads to poor digestion and fatness. Well. HAPIfork sure has the Appeal to Fear propaganda technique down. Their marketing team must have studied under my grandma. That said, indigestion and fatness are indeed afflictions of which we should be fearful given their tendency to cause everything from acid reflux to heart disease to, worst of all, first-date-with-a-hot-chick gas. (I recommend Odafree pills for the latter.) The HAPIfork steps in to help us gain control of our speed eating, and track our face-stuffing habits.
The HAPIfork utensil, along with a HAPILABS Online Dashboard and mobile app, records its user's eating habits according to "fork servings." A "fork serving" qualifies as each time the HAPIfork moves from plate to mouth. Using this (probably highly scientific and definitely ingeniously named) unit of measurement, the utensil monitors how often we're eating, how long it took us to consume the meal, the number of fork servings we took per minute, and the length of time between each fork serving. In addition to silent data recorder and analyst, the HAPIfork also plays guilt-tripping hall monitor, flashing indicator lights during meals when we're eating too fast.
When ready to face the truth, users upload HAPIfork data via USB to their Online Dashboard for review, and can employ the included HAPILABS coaching program to help improve eating behaviors. The fork's mobile app stores health and fitness progress, keeps records of performance data (sleep, meals, exercise), and enables users to save HAPImoments captured in photos, videos, and inspirational quotes from Maya Angelou.
If you couldn't tell, I am skeptical of the HAPIfork. First, it seems a little gimmicky. Maybe not Japanese Tongue Exerciser gimmicky, but certainly late-night infomercial with Ron Popeil gimmicky. However, my (literally) bigger issue with this fork is that it's freakin' huge! A fork fit not for normal-sized mortals, but for Shaquille O'Neals. Dolf Lundgrens. Christina Aguileras. Kind of counterintuitive to design a utensil that can hold 5 times a typical bite of food given that its purpose is to help people consume less. And I can't even imagine how much it must weigh. 20 pounds maybe? I guess on the upshot, if I took 50 bites I'd probably burn 500 calories using it to eat my chicken & waffles.
DudeIWantThat.com is reader-supported. When you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more.
/ginnie-juicer-compact-61537.jpg?mode=crop "Ginnie Juicer - Compact Masticating Slow Juicer")
Ginnie Juicer - Compact Masticating Slow Juicer
"Ginnie" is a very nice name for a juicer. Ginnie sounds cute. And this compact kitchen gadget that won't take up more than a 5" footprint on your countertop most definitely is. Ginnie sounds fun. The juicer comes in...
Over-the-Sink Dish Drying Rack
This over-the-sink dish drying rack is a 2-tier space saver with a side of storage and organization. A real multi-tasker that does it all with poise and elegance. Sound like any maternal figure you might know? One who...
Stirio - Automatic Pot Stirrer
Life hacking innovator Unikia adds the Stirio to its online showroom of tools that will expedite and elevate the filling of my belly. We previously saw the Compleat FoodSkin flexible lunchbox, a simple trick for keeping...
/chefn-cob-corn-stripper-60401.jpg?mode=crop "Chef'n Cob Corn Stripper")
Chef'n Cob Corn Stripper
This Cob Corn Stripper (not to be confused with a lady in a cornfield on a Hitch 'Er Up Stripper Pole) better work damn good, and without making a mess, because despite my rant last week about breaking up ground
/knork-matte-black-titanium-29080.jpg "Knork Matte Black Titanium Flatware")
Knork Matte Black Titanium Flatware
Modern, industrial, functional, and Black. Knork's set of matte black flatware brings the company's combo cutlery concept to the Dark Side...
LED Lightsaber Chopsticks
Father-son lightsaber battles over Kung Pao chicken are about to get the LED treatment. Original lightsaber chopstick fabricator Kotobukiya continues its journey through their Galactic Republic of Replica Awesomeness...
GoBe Automatic Calorie Intake Tracker
Healbe calls its GoBe wristband a 100% automatic body manager. Like the scads of other fitness trackers available and forthcoming today, this means it detects and provides feedback on biometrics such as heart rate, blood...
Halo Top Eat-the-Whole-Pint Healthy Ice Cream
This is the Halo Top pitch: 240 to 280 calories per pint*, and it more than doesn't suck. In fact, get a jar of PB2, mix some of that powdery peanut butter goodness into a personal vat of Halo Top Chocolate, and you won't...
Stink Yourself Slim Spray
Stink Yourself Slim is not a joke. It's not a gag gift or an Instructables project some dude made at home to give to the lardass who hogs all of the chocolate long johns when someone brings donuts to work. Yeah, I know...
/monbento-x-opinel-on-the-go-60118.jpg?mode=crop "Monbento x Opinel On-the-Go Meal Kit")
Monbento x Opinel On-the-Go Meal Kit
If you'd like a fancy pants lunch box and some fancy pants cutlery to properly complement your fancy pants lunch of leftover lamb chops with blackberry chutney, look no further than Opinel's On-the-Go Meal Kit collaboration...
Trongs - Finger Food Utensils
Obviously I like eating with my hands. It goes with the territory of being a man. Buuut...I really hate when BBQ and Buffalo wing sauce get under my fingernails and into the cuts I have from doing manly things with my...
/ka-bar-tactical-spork-23783.jpg "Ka-Bar Tactical Spork")
Ka-Bar Tactical Spork
See, it's a fork-spoon combo up top with a...knife!...that pulls out from the handle. And - and! - it's black. Ka-Bar's Tactical Spork is a tactical tool for tactical eating if I've ever seen one. Imagine the stealth...