The Dog Treadmill

Posted: June 19, 2013
The Dog Treadmill
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I don't understand why the dog needs a treadmill. 1) Can't its human owner just take it outside to run around, or 2) can't it just use the treadmill its human owner already has? Oh wait, now that I've written it down it all becomes clear. Both of the above scenarios presume the human owner makes getting off his or her own fat ass a regular practice. I don't know about you, but in my case that would not be happening. Do you know how awful running on some digitized Precor POS is? Almost as awful as running on grass or pavement. So dog, meet your new exercise buddy: the Dog Treadmill. It's cool if you pretend it's a lady Yorkie and hump it when you're done working out.

This DogTread accommodates pooches weighing up to 30 pounds, which in my experience are those most likely to get fat and slovenly. Like my ex-girlfriend's big fat fattie Westie, who always got the indignant, "He's not fat, he's big boned!" treatment from her when I pointed it out. Its programmable speed ranges from 0 to 5 mph and the tread surface incline is adjustable.

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