Middle Finger Toilet Paper Holder
Flipping the bird becomes much more than a cheap gesture with this Middle Finger Toilet Paper Holder. Instead, Pygmallionaire's 3D-printed and hand-painted metallic design is a functional luxury!
Functional because, as its name suggests, the Middle Finger Toilet Paper Holder actually mounts to your bathroom wall and holds a roll of toilet paper at the ready for you. Luxury because...yeek...it costs $120 to be told to F off every time you sit down to take a shit.
Or perhaps, the Middle Finger Toilet Paper Holder isn't here to tell you to stick it, but to stick it for you. You know, after you've overindulged on the bao buns and Bud Light, and need a little help to get things moving. What? A finger up the butt can most definitely cure constipation. Especially if you coat it in glycerine.
My point is, in addition to providing a rude sentiment, the Middle Finger Toilet Paper Holder could also provide a great service. So too would it be the perfect companion to the Poop Knife, as together they would form the perfect tag team of successful and non-clogging toilet activities.
The Middle Finger Toilet Paper Holder shoves it up the Charmin roll in your choice of gold, silver, or copper finishes.
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Collapsible Middle Finger
The wind up F you is one you'll always have, er, on hand and all, but this Collapsible Middle Finger accessory will make an even bolder statement when used to pepper your gestures and enhance your communication skills...
/flik-middle-finger-car-59131.jpg?mode=crop "FLIK Middle Finger Car Windshield Light")
FLIK Middle Finger Car Windshield Light
Put yourself on the receiving end of some road rage with the FLIK of your wrist middle finger car windshield light. The FLIK is a partly funny, all the way horrible gadget drivers can install on the backs of their vehicles...
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Flipping the Bird Trophy
Tell me without telling me you'd like me to F off. That's the essence of this otherwise handsome Bird Trophy - no, Flipping the Bird Trophy - from Uncommon Goods...
Middle Finger Key
Nothing gives me more satisfaction than finding new and exciting ways of flipping people off. First, an umbrella, and now, a housekey. The Middle Finger key--or as vendor Goodworth & Co. calls it, the "Best Wishes" key--is...
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Flippin' Mittens
If you can't score a pair of Bernie Mittens, might I suggest Flippin' Mittens as a close second in eye-catching and meme-worthy mitten designs? Running as a limited edition from Matt Benedetto's Unnecessary Inventions...
/bird-flippin-the-bird-53500.jpg?mode=crop "Bird Flippin' the Bird - Middle Finger Chicken Arms")
Bird Flippin' the Bird - Middle Finger Chicken Arms
As raising chickens grows in popularity throughout urban / suburban communities, so too does buying your chickens their own gear and accessories. A dapper chicken harness. 3D printed chicken arms. And now, 3D printed...
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Road Rage Restrictor
What?! Road Rage Restrictor? Middle finger on lockdown? Well, more like Pointer, Ring Finger, and Pinky on lockup. But, but, why? One of the only redeeming qualities of driving today is being able to flip off other drivers...
/flipem-the-bird-gloves-37307.jpg?mode=crop "Flip'em the Bird Gloves")
Flip'em the Bird Gloves
Give a pair of Flip'em the Bird Gloves as a gift for your girlfriend and find out just what a gift that keeps on giving...possibly back to you...can mean. This line of fingerless gloves are made of soft, stretchy acrylic...
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Candle Hand Hand Gesture Candles
Not only do Hand Gesture Candles light up some of the most famous, and infamous, gestures of the world, they do it as exact replicas of a real human hand. Cast in paraffin, Hand Gesture Candles are life-size, and textured...
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Middle Finger Birthday Glasses
I bought one of these middle finger birthday glasses for my father-in-law, who turns 80 - haha, 80, the crusty old fart! - this year. I went with the "I'm 79 + [flipped bird standing in for the number '1']" rocks glass...
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Middle Finger Decanter
Tom Brady is #1 again! One finger over, for some of you dudes. And for those who can't bring themselves to celebrate Tampa Bay's Super Bowl LV win, here's Middle Finger Decanter to help you drown your sorrows, and continue...
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Light My Fingers Candle
By "Light My Fingers," this most excellent candle from Claire Olshan really means, "Light 3 of my fingers and my thumb. The 4th finger, well, it's gonna stay long and strong in the middle, fully formed and upright as...