$10 Million Human Regenerator for Anti-Aging
- LifeCell All In One Anti-Aging Treatment - $189.00
- Athena 7 Minute Face Lift - $89.00
- Anti-Wrinkle Beauty Pillow - $49.95
- Furlesse Rows Anti-Aging Patches for Forehead Wrinkles - $19.99
- DermaGen Anti-Wrinkle Patches - $9.95
Well, $10 million is the price for the super deluxe, diamond-encrusted model of The Human Regenerator. Bargain hunters who are OK with regenerating unsound cells, strengthening their immune systems, and enhancing skin structure in a space capsule that isn't covered in 172,000 unique gems can have the age-defying device for only $557,000.
Designed and sold by System4, a luxury and futuristic product firm out of Bremen, Germany, the Human Regenerator is programmed to emit quantum pulses that imitate and elicit response from the body's natural frequencies, ranging between 0.0005 and 38.00 Hz. The machine's magnetic emissions supposedly breathe (ray gun?) new life into aging or faltering cells to preserve both appearance and system-wide health. It also incorporates silicon and aluminum deposits, said to have an anti-aging influence, into the treatment.
To activate the transformation process, fountain of youth seekers walk upright into the Human Regenerator and use a touchscreen to fire up the cocoon, which ultimately rotates 90 degrees and fights wrinkles and free radicals from a horizontal position.
System4 has limited Human Regenerator production to 50 units per year. I'm not sure if that includes the $10 million diamond-dripping model, which only just debuted in Abu Dhabi's Emirates Palace on September 27, 2013. I sure hope not. Wouldn't want Santy to have any more trouble than he already will acquiring one for me this Christmas.