Baby Octopus Costume
- Giant Octopus Stuffed Animal Baby Costume - $69.99
- Rasta Imposta Men's Octopus Costume - $53.00
- Knit Adult Octopus with Tentacles Hat - $28.99
- Yellow Squid Hat - $15.99
Yep. That disposition looks about right for a baby in an octopus costume. Sure, you think turning your kid into an 8-legged puffy pink pillow with 0% mobility (albeit 80% protection from bumps and falls) is precious and adorable. But what about the poor kid stuffed inside the Baby Octopus Costume? What do they think? Take a look at the image gallery above, and I think you'll see the progression.
Mama, hi Mama. Goo-goo-ga-ga.
Oh, uppy? Yes, I want uppy. Oh, that feels soft...and squishy. Almost as nice as my Pillow Pets Chewbacca. It's...wha-what's happening, Mama? The plushie is stuck to me. It's...it's everywhere.
Wait, where am I going? Back down? Back down, stuffed inside this octopus? A word and concept I haven't even learned yet? I don't know about this. I'm not sure I like it.
No, scratch that. I am definitely sure I don't like it. And now...now there's a camera in my face? You're taking pics of me buried in a cephalopod for your social media, Mama? WTF? WTF, Mama?! What. The. Actual. WWWAAAHHH!
The Baby Octopus Costume from Grand Budapest Botique is a 47" unisex piece designed to delight parents and devastate children the world over. While an obvious gift for Halloween , the giant squid's two-tone pink plush fabric makes it a top toddler torture choice for Valentine's Day and Easter too.
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Octopus Headphone Wall Hanger
Guess how many pairs of headphones you can hang from the Octopus Headphone Wall Hanger. ... Wrong! Not eight, but nine. Nine over-ear headsets will fit on M3is3D's rockin' octo, because the pink 'pus is an audiophile...
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The Animal Chair Collection
The Animal Chair collection constitutes a diverse range of species, from mammals to reptiles, and even insects. Each creation retains the animal's natural vitality whilst being totally biologically accurate in their appearance...
Kraken Flasks
Rejoice ye liquor-sipping non-smokers who thought the Octopus Pipes we featured last month would be cool, if only you inhaled. Kraken Flasks are here to evoke equal reverence from those who enjoy a fine swig of Scotch...
Octopus Kite
I don't think the giant 3D Octopus Kite that's for sale is quite the same as the giant 3D Octopus Kite flying in the above video. But maybe your kids won't notice that when, after showing them the graceful cephalopod...
Octopus Pipe
Usually when some smug schmuck tells me to put that in my pipe and smoke it I must restrain myself from punching them in the face. But I think part of the reason such restraint is necessary is that I don't often enough...
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The Rocktopus
Can you smell what The Rocktopus is cooking?! Mmmm, pulpo a la plancha...
Octopus Couch
Really this couch is called the Aster Papposus Sofa, but who knows what the hell an aster papposus is? I can't even pronounce those words together, and have just resorted to reading them as Snuffleupagus. To whom the...
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Alfred the Giant Crochet Octopus
I can't tell exactly how giant Alfred the Giant Crochet Octopus is, but if the evidence in the image gallery above is any indication, he appears to be the equivalent of 1 x standard lady who has not yet mastered the art...
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Kraken Dildo
Unleash the Kraken Dildo! Seven inches long and suction-cup ready for anal penetration! ... Uh, what? On second thought, dude, keep that thing to yourself. I'm still reeling over the Corn Dog Butt Plug...
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Pearl Diver Octopus Water Fountain
Yarr! I got me a wicked tharrst! Unleash the Kraken...water fountain. Sean M. Monaghan designed this octopus fountain, called Pearl Diver, for SPLASH! restaurant in the Santa Cruz Municipal Wharf. The double drinker is...
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Octopus Banana Rug
My doomsday prediction for 2023: the Octopus Bananas will come for us! And since we'll all be dead or enslaved, and unable to get merch and gear to remember it by, here's an Octopus Banana Rug you can buy before the Octo-Banana-pocalypse...
Iyashi Octopus Sucker Massager
Hmmm, what do you think, is that picture Photoshopped? And if it isn't would you consider having a pinky-sized chunk of your cheek Stretch Armstrong-ed a foot away from your face: 1) relaxing; and 2) $81 well spent?...