Jet Black Toothpaste
/jet-black-toothpaste-12492.jpg "Jet Black Toothpaste")
Now this looks disgusting and promising. Binotomo Nasu Dentifrice, or Jet Black Toothpaste, expands upon the ideas that 1) adding charcoal powder to beauty products will extract skin impurities and whiten teeth, and 2) once you go black, you'll never go back.
The Japanese tube of black magic combines the cleansing properties of charcoal with the salty allure of Japanese eggplant. Yes, that's right. In addition to looking like the color of rotten teeth, Jet Black Toothpaste also tastes like a pickled vegetable. Bonus #2: it will also stain your clothes! All in the name of super whiteness from super blackness.
Jet Black Toothpaste comes in packs of 2 in case you want to share some with your chain-smoking, coffee-guzzling oral horror of a friend. Additional teeth cleaning ingredients include water, sea salt, menthol, glycerin, kaolin, calcium carbonate, and Xylitol. If the toothpaste causes skin or gum irritation, its makers suggest seeking a dental specialist and scheduling a denture fitting.
Blizzident - 6-Second Toothbrush
It looks like someone put the inside of a sea urchin on the inside of a mouthpiece, but if Blizzident really works, I wouldn't care if it looked like one of the McPoyle brothers' armpits. I'll be able to brush my teeth--and...
blk. - Black Bottled Water
We wondered too, but the answer is no. blk. black bottled water is not part of an SNL skit � la black caulk or Colon Blow. It's a real artesian spring water from aquifers in Canada's Sandiland Forest Reserve. And it takes...
/puking-grogu-baby-yoda-48419.jpg?mode=crop "Puking Grogu Baby Yoda Toothpaste Topper")
Puking Grogu Baby Yoda Toothpaste Topper
Reminding people of vomit has always been a good way to get them to brush their teeth, but it goes a little differently when the Puking Grogu, a 3D-printed Baby Yoda toothpaste topper comes into play. Whereas normally...
DIY Jet Black Hellfire Burgers
I wouldn't be surprised if the secret ingredient to concocting a jet black burger that looks like it's been roasted on the flames of hell was one that inflicted a weeklong case of Montezuma's Revenge. But, somewhat ironically...
Amabrush 10-Second Automatic Toothbrush
Amabrush says it's the World's First Automatic Toothbrush, but watching the demo video makes me think it's just the first time someone thought to cross a Blizzident with a vibrator...
/dark-days-of-summer-et-cool-54901.jpg?mode=crop "Dark Days of Summer: 13 Cool Summer Products in Black")
Dark Days of Summer: 13 Cool Summer Products in Black
I'm summer lovin' these 13 cool summer products in black, and not a-one of them is named Danny Zuko. (And I still say Sandy deserved better. Ladies, you shouldn't have to change yourself into a skin-tight-leather clad...
/halloween-spirit-12-cool-51612.jpg?mode=crop "Halloween Spirit: 12 Cool Products in Orange & Black")
Halloween Spirit: 12 Cool Products in Orange & Black
I should have found 13 cool products in orange & black to make this compilation even more true to the Halloween spirit I claim it embodies - or rather, disembodies. But I'm lazy, so you get 12...
/shark-raw-blank-motorcycle-19996.jpg "Shark RAW Blank Motorcycle Helmet")
Shark RAW Blank Motorcycle Helmet
Shark's RAW Blank may not be as attention-grabbing as the Batman motorcycle helmet, but: 1) the stylized muzzle and LP-looking side discs will still turn some heads; and 2) for the sake of your credibility as a rider...
Shark Tooth Weapons
Land shark! Or at least the scariest part of the shark now available to tear into human flesh on land. Dane Kealoha's shark tooth weapons style themselves after traditional blades and blunt implements with walloping power...
/knork-matte-black-titanium-29080.jpg "Knork Matte Black Titanium Flatware")
Knork Matte Black Titanium Flatware
Modern, industrial, functional, and Black. Knork's set of matte black flatware brings the company's combo cutlery concept to the Dark Side...
/dick-head-toothpaste-topper-52185.jpg?mode=crop "Dick-Head Toothpaste Topper Cap (NSFW)")
Dick-Head Toothpaste Topper Cap (NSFW)
The Dick-Head Toothpaste Topper Cap says, "Dude, you have the nicest teeth I've ever come across."...
/matador-refillable-travel-60870.jpg?mode=crop "Matador Refillable Travel Toothpaste Tubes")
Matador Refillable Travel Toothpaste Tubes
A Refillable Travel Toothpaste Tube, now that is a great idea. I am charging full speed ahead to get my horns on this waving red cape from Matador. (Note: the Refillable Toothpaste Tubes come in a set of black and white...